Big Business vs. Small Business!

Acting is interesting when you are a six foot five inch tall, slender, male. Just this week I was cast as "Big Business" in a FedEx commercial produced by Manny Castro of FVGproductions. Apparently, despite the fact my grandfather escaped abject eastern European poverty, fought the Nazis in the Polish Brigade of the RAF, and emigrated to America with nothing but the clothes on his back, because his chromosomes are male and light-skinned, and look good in a suit, less than one generation later) I will be cast to represent everything liberals have branded as wrong with capitalism, America, and the world... a.k.a. "The Man."

It was a very entertaining shoot. The gist is as follows. I represent Big Business and I am mentoring several "proteges," small business owners, and showing them the ropes of making a profit. All of these actors were 5 foot to 5 foot six inches, so you could see there was a dramatic visual contrast in the cast. All of my omniscient capitalist wisdom is summed up into one piece of advice, "to Think Fed-Ex first for all your shipping needs." Supposedly, FedEx's 1800 office locations and online small business shipping tools make it possible for small businesses to pull more profits.

I do not know how true these claims are, as I have never owned a small business that included shipping. I do know however, that when we had to get the signs made for the commercial, the same signs you can see in the attached picture, we first went to FedEx/Kinko's and they were going to charge us 30 dollars per sign so we crossed the street to Staples and got the same signs made for half the price!